Port Elizabeth Sevens roll on…

So… it’s about that time of the year when summer kicks in South Africa. And this year things are looking good.  Juju is on his way out, our neighbourhood dictator Mugabe is on his last legs and Gary Kirsten is coaching the Proteas.  All signs point to a summer of love…

The smell of freshly cut grass, cheap sun-screen and the opportunity to haul out some old moldy cricket gear to so if it is possible that somehow you magically acquired the ability to become a vicious pace bowler over the winter while you were chinning pints at the Local.

Of course, all of this means that it is 7s rugby time too.  And this year, the carnival moves away from the Garden Route and rolls into Port Elizabeth.

Hell.. I’d love to be there this weekend.  Booze, good weather and a decent stadium that doesn’t look like it was made a mad Stalinist dictator during the concrete revival era of architecture.  Nope, instead the PE locals will be savoring beer and good rugby, while turning a brighter shade of pink.  As for me… I’ll be in airports queues.

When watching 7s do you ever the idea that these guys would absolutely smoke a Super 15 rugby team given half the chance?  The average Super 15 rugby player is so unfit from having been overplayed on top of still feeling the effects of the big night out throwing dwarves and harassing local waitresses they just wouldn’t be able to hold a flame to 7s team.

Cecil Afrika, Branco du Preez… hell… I’d take these guys in the bok squad any day over the over-the-hill out of shape fatties that pass for Springboks.

Enjoy the rugby ladies and gents. It only rolls around once a year.

Port Elizabeth gets to host the 7s piss up

Port Elizabeth's only rugby fan is already staking Nelson Mandela Bay Stadium in order to find the best vantage point from which to watch the action.

In a bit of an upset, SARU announced that Port Elizabeth would be hosting the South African annual 7s rugby tournament. Although the tournament was previously held in George, there was wide speculation that Cape Town were the front runners.

In related news, shares of South African Breweries and Namibian Breweries tanked on the relevation that a combined drinking force of UCT and Stellenbosch students would not be assaulting the beverage stands at Green Point.

As Cape Town locals, the team from Big Daddy Rugby were hoping for a successful Cape Town bid, in order not only to spend all that hard earned pocket money, but also in the hopes of finding one more reason for getting inebriated and hurling abuse at other Cape Townians who choose to support the Kiwis.

We may very well have to find non-rugby reasons to stumble blindly drunk around Green Point stadium come 7’s season. Perhaps we can catch the Pirates-Chiefs derby at Rafiki’s. But we ain’t trekking to P.E. for a 7s tournament.  Why?  Too quiet!

The purists will argue that it is good for the game for 7s to move to Nelson Mandela Bay, and they are right.  It will be good to see rugby grow in an area where there has been a strong player base, if not a strong supporter base.  I can’t help but think that the alcohol breweries have missed a trick here.  They shouldn’t have let WP rugby do the bid, they should have just marched right into SARU, showed them Big Daddy Rugby’s alchohol tab from the 2007 World Cup, and the minister of finance would have intervened to ensure Cape Town got the bid.

Well, I guess it’s time for Big Daddy Rugby to put away the pirate costumes, beer hats and inflammatory signboards that were all bought prematurely. We’ll have to save that for the netball season.

Growth of the game aside, there is one other advantage for Cape Townians in losing the 7s bid – we won’t have to put up with the pseudo-Kiwis waving All Black flags at Green Point.