Quade Cooper sidelined with ‘broken heart’

The outspoken Aussie fly-half is in the dog house once again with the Australian Rugby Union.

This time it’s for a series of stroppy teenager-like tweets voicing his disapproval of the Wallaby management, with his accusations ranging from the existential to the just plain ludicrous.

In one he claims that he is being ‘destroyed’ as a player and a person. In another he says he is not being allowed to play the type of rugby HE wants to play….Butt-naked rugby? Underwater rugby? Quality rugby?!….who knows!

Another tweet just gets downright weird with what appears to be a reference to the classic Alice Cooper track Poison:

I want to love you but I better not touch (#don’t touch?)
I want to hold you, but my senses tell me to stop
I want to kiss you but I want it too much (#too much?)
I want to taste you but your lips are venomous poison

We can only assume these angst-ridden words are directed at his off-the-field bromance with Sonny-Bill Williams, with whom he has threatened to elope to rugby league  at the end of the season unless he is provided with the following:

  • his own changing-room with wall-to-wall mirrors
  • personalised number plates reading ‘QC69 4EVA’
  • a pet anaconda

Quade and Sonny-Bill in better times…Sonny never quite got the basic principles of rock,scissors, paper.

citizenmike2000

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